Saturday, October 26, 2013

In the Midst of Despair [A Prayer]

Have you ever had one of those down days?  Where you feel like everyone and everything is against you?  Even though you know God is on your side and He alone can give you the comfort you need, you still feel. . .alone.  It seems redundant, but still, it can happen. 

Thursday was a beautiful day.  I awoke to sun-filled clouds and a cool October morning.  Praise to my King who gives me breath! 

We had our second wood-fire of the season in the old fire-place, to ward off the chill.  Quiet time over breakfast, with my Bible turned to Psalm 37. "Trust in the Lord and do what is good; dwell in the land and live securely.  Take delight in the Lord, and He will give you your heart's desire.  Commit your way to the Lord; trust in Him, and He will act, making your righteousness shine like the dawn, your justice like the noonday." (Ps. 37:3-6)

Working at the dance studio from 1:30pm to 3:45, taking inventory of costumes to be used for the Christmas recital.  Variety, ballet, and tap till 6:15pm, then it's back to work!  And home by 8pm, with a yummy Mexican rice dish that Julia made for dinner, and an episode of the A-Team to conclude the day!

Lying in bed, I'm overcome with worry for my future--gotta find a part-time job somewhere; the library is not hiring right now; where else can I try? in the meantime, how will I pay for this and that? what about this? etc. etc. 

Needless worry.  I know God is in control.  He holds my life in His hands, and I am eternally grateful, but sometimes life is overwhelming.  As a result, I composed this poem:

Pinterest
Though I trust Your faithful will;
Though I praise You ever still,
In the dark of the night long,
My heart cries out this song:
Oh my God, hear my plea!
Rescue me from the driving sea!
When the world beats me down,
And in despair I seem to drown;
When my future is unclear,
And my worries always near;
Though Your voice whispers love--
My lack of faith, I'm ashamed of.
Though my heart is Yours to keep,
Why do I still cry myself to sleep?

Then, just this morning, guess what I read in my quiet time over a breakfast of pancakes and sausage?

Psalm 38, Prayer of a Suffering Sinner.

These are the verses that stood out to me:

"Lord, do not punish me in Your anger or discipline me in Your wrath. . . For my sins have flooded over my head; they are a burden too heavy for me to bear. . .I am faint and severely crushed; I groan because of the anguish of my heart.  Lord, my every desire is known to You; my sighing is not hidden from You.  My heart races, my strength leaves me, and even the light of my eyes has faded. . . [However] I put my hope in You, Lord; You will answer, Lord my God. . . Lord, do not abandon me; my God, do not be far from me.  Hurry to help me, Lord, my Savior."  
(Ps. 38:1,4,8-10, 21-22)

Wow.  Just how I felt. 

I don't mean to depress you!  This is just one way God shows me His love.  That in my darkest hours, He doesn't stop loving me!  His Word is there for comfort, reproof, and guidance.

Though He is silent, He is never far.  Though unseen, He always stands by your side.  And when He deems it necessary, He will carry you.  We are not alone!

This brings to mind a fiction trilogy I read a while back called, The Door Within.  Throughout the three books, the characters had a one liner that stood as their battle cry to give courage where courage was hard to find, comfort in the midst of despair, and peace when all seemed hopeless:  Never alone!

Worrying about the future is pointless and an absolute waste of time. 

If Christ is in me, what have I to fear?

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9 comments:

Christina L said...

That's a beautiful poem, Sarah :)
I love it when that happens! That verse is so encouraging, thank you for sharing!
Christina

Lauriloth said...

Wow! That is some powerful stuff. This is a reminder I need daily, because boy can I despair over life when there's absolutely nothing to despair over. The Lord is right with us through everything!

Thank you for these beautiful words. I needed the encouragement today.

(And I'm also a huge fan of The Door Within trilogy!)

Sarah Elizabeth said...

Christina: Thank you! =]

Lauri: And thank you! I'm so glad this has encouraged others--that was my goal! Yes! Awesome books! It's about time for me to re-read them...

I appreciate your comments, ladies! Have a blessed day!

Jody Dake said...

Sarah, I love you. God is with you and I am praying for you. You will make it through with His help and guidance. <3

Always Experiencing Him,
Mom

Sarah Elizabeth said...

Thank you, Ma <3

Love you more!

Tangerine-Tane said...

This is such a wonderful post, Sarah! I definitely have those awful nights where I lie awake worrying, worrying, worrying...but your post has encouraged me. Thanks. :)
Tane ♥

Sarah Elizabeth said...

Thank you so much, Tane! I'm so glad to hear that you, too, have been encouraged =]

Have a blessed day!

Nine said...

This was like, perfect. I so needed to hear this, because I can relate.

PS: I love the A-Team!
Thanks! x

Sarah Elizabeth said...

Thank you, Nine! ^__^

Blessings this day!